A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions
by Ninja C
Summary: Collab between me - Ninja C -, Tassel630, and Akira43. No chapter connections whatsoever. Just a little collection of Max Ride oneshots for our own entertainment, and, if we're lucky, yours too. Completed.
1. Angel and Ari

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Hey, Ninja C here. This diddy here is a collab. With Akira43 and Tassel630 (and, obviously, myself). So, in our neck of the woods, today's the last day of Winter Break. I decided to blow the party out by kicking this little dealio off.**

**Disclaimer: None of us own anything. Let's just face it, guys, we're pretty lame.**

A is for: Angel and Ari

Ari was chewing at the bars restraining her flock. Angel could see why, from up above, they all looked so scared of him. He looked really mad. There was blood everywhere. Even Max was doing a great job acting like she didn't know what was happening.

Angel swung her iron bar, knocking out three more attackers while Max explained their little plot to the flock. She distantly heard Fang say that he'd take Ari out. He – they all – didn't know that Ari was helping them. Ari stepped back, and Angel yelled, "He's on our side! He's with me! He's getting you out! Ari!" she then directed at the bloody Eraser. "_Release the secret weapon!_"

Total leapt out and started attacking enemies like there was no tomorrow. Angel was so glad Max had let her keep him, and she knew the rest of the flock secretly was, too. And she was really grateful to Ari for finding him and bringing him back. That was one reason why she'd teamed up with him for this little show.

They all took off, leaving the stinking School behind. Ari labored to catch up to the flock, half of whom were already gone, in disgust that he was even there at all. But Angel stayed behind, and Ari gave her a hesitant half-smile. Angel returned it.

After all, she couldn't just act like he hadn't saved her flock.

**And this was Chapters 53 and 54 from Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports in Angel's POV. Case you were wondering. The rest of the chapters will hopefully be more lighthearted. I just thought of an A topic.**

**Next chapter, I tag… Tassel630!**


	2. Batchelder

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Ahem. Apparently Ninja C here neglected to inform me of one little point in this collab of ours. I HAVE TO FINISH THE NEXT CHAPTER BY TODAY. Excuse me while I cheerfully kick Ninja C repeatedly in the shins.**

**Aaaaaaaaaaanyways.**

**Disclaimer: I'm wondering if James Patterson is as violent with his friends as my friends and I are with each other.**

B is for: Batchelder

"Bat-chel-der," Jeb said, slowly and clearly.

"Backle-fer," a four-year-old Gasman giggled.

"Bat-chel-der," Jeb said again.

"Buckle-nerd!" Gazzy shouted happily, waving his wings around and knocking a lamp off of a table with his six-foot wingspan.

"Is it just me, or has he said every single word in the English language besides 'Batchelder'?" ten-year-old Fang asked from his place slouched on the couch, a slight smile slipping onto his face. His wings were spread over the entire couch, forcing Max into the chair with two-year-old Angel in her lap. Nudge, at seven, was trying to help Jeb, but giggling even more than Gazzy was. Iggy wasn't in the room.

"Gazzer, you have to learn to say Jeb's name," Nudge laughed. "You can't grow up calling him Jeb Buckle-nerd! That would be funny, if he was, like, talking to someone and introduced Jeb as Mr. Buckle-nerd, and the other guy would be like, that is a REALLY weird name, and then Jeb would, like, have to explain, and - "

"Bat-chel-der," Jeb interrupted her loudly.

"OW! IGGY, GET YOUR BUTT OFF MY WING!" Fang shouted. Iggy had, apparently, entered the room and tried to sit on the couch.

"That's what you get for taking up the whole couch."

"Look at that! You bent one of my feathers!"

"BAT-CHEL-DER," said a very deep voice from behind Jeb, who had turned to separate the quibbling boys.

"Was that... Gazzy?" Nudge asked uncertainly.

"Gasser, that is SO gross!" Max shouted, jumping to her feet and fleeing the room. "He FARTED Jeb's name!"

"Ew!"

"That's disGUSting!"

Iggy, with his sensitive nose gagged, retched, and ran.

"I am LEAVING now!"

The Gasman was left alone on the living room floor, proudly proving to the carpet that he would never have trouble introducing Jeb as an adult.

**A/N: Yay, huzzah, humor! I personally found this idea hilarious. And by the way, reviewing is a good thing.**

**I really, REALLY want to tag Ninja C back. But Akira43 needs a turn, and I will take the higher road. (Conveniently, there is a pothole in the higher road, and this pothole involves bashing Ninja C in the head with a crowbar repeatedly after I creep through her window in the middle of the night.) I'll just have to get her back on X or something. So, Akira, have fun with C.**


	3. Collaborative Chocolate Cake

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Unlike Tassel, I'm happy that it's my turn. Too many ideas keep popping up from the most random places. Originally, I was going to do a different story for C, but then I thought of this and just **_**had**_** to write it down. So here it is. Not very good, and kinda lame, but oh well. I always think that everything I write is horrible anyways.**

**Disclaimer: Uh, my initials aren't JP, which also happens to stand for Jello Pancakes. I've never tried those either. Do they taste good?**

C is for: Collaborative Chocolate Cake

"Alright guys. I'm serious about this. We all have to collaborate and try to make this whole school thing work, okay? I hate it too, and that headmaster guy seriously needs to have his butt kicked all the way to Pluto, but we all still _have to try._"

It was after dinner on the same day that I rescued the Gasman and Iggy from the Headmaster's office, and the flock was gathered around me in my room, rolling their eyes and pretending not to listen to me lecturing them—again—on why they _had_ to try to blend in at school.

"The thing is, Anne has given us a lot, and the least we can do to give back a little is go to school for her and _not_ get kicked out," I continued, knowing that they were actually listening but pretending not to. "Anne has given us a roof over our heads, beds to sleep in, access to a hot shower, and food. What's even better is that we don't have to worry about our wings being seen when we're around her, either. So we have to do everything we can to keep these things as long as we can, providing it's safe, while we look for our parents. So behave. Kapeesh?"

"Sure, whatever," my flock mumbled. I stared down the Gasman and Iggy, letting them know that everything went double for them, although as usual it did nothing on Iggy.

We spent another hour or so in my room, trying to decode the remaining pages from the Institute, and then I sent the younger ones off to bed.

As I walked back into my room after saying goodnight to Nudge, I discovered that Fang was still sitting on my bed where I'd left him.

"Hey," I called out, and he looked up at me. "I thought that you were going to bed, too."

Fang just looked at me with his "obviously not" face.

I plopped down on my bed next to him, knowing that he would tell me why he was still here when he was ready.

"Anne makes good chocolate cake," he said after a few minutes of silence.

"Wha-?" I asked, shocked. I hadn't expected him to say something like that. He's not usually that… random.

"She's a good cook."

"Technically she would be a good baker," I corrected, my mind still reeling trying to figure out what was going on.

Fang just stared.

"Not as good as you are," he continued after a moment. "Your chocolate cake is the best."

It was my turn to stare, except I didn't have the decency to try to keep my mouth closed.

"Especially the one you made for my birthday last year. Do you remember that?"

"No," I was startled into saying. "Why would I make _you_ a _chocolate cake_? And even if I tried to, we both know it would just turn out to be a huge brick. Literally."

Fang nodded, seeming satisfied with my response. This just caused my confusion to reach an all-time high.

"What's up with you, anyways? Why are you acting so weird? And asking so many questions? Wait," I interjected into my own rant, "You're not a- a _Fang II_ are you? Because that would just be… not right."

I moved my face inches from his, staring at him intently to see if he looked any different. He didn't, not that that meant anything, so I knocked up on the top of his head a few times to see if he was actually a robot or something like that.

He knocked me upside the head right back. Yep, this _had_ to be Fang. That was his typical response, anyways.

"Be reasonable, Max," he said, sounding exasperated. "I'm not a robot or a clone or anything."

"Yeah, because that's exactly what a clone _wouldn't_ say—they'd tell the truth instead," I replied sarcastically.

"You're not a clone either," he went on.

"No freaking duh!" I cried, struggling to keep my voice under control in my frustration. "And how did you arrive at that conclusion, Captain Obvious?"

Dead serious, Fang looked at me and said, "You were appalled by the idea that I loved the chocolate cake you didn't make for my on my birthday last year."

I just looked at him, debating between killing him _now _and letting him live so I could beat him up first, and _then_ kill him.

The fact that he now had a huge grin plastered on his face didn't help with my current anger-management problems.

Eventually, I found my voice. Kind of. "_Why did you think that I was a clone?"_ ground out, using my if-you-don't-tell-me-the-truth-and-the-whole-truth-right-now-I-will-gladly-beat-you-to-a-pulp voice.

Still grinning, yet serious, he said, "You used the word 'collaborate'. The Max I know doesn't use big fancy vocabulary words like that."

"Well, maybe _this_ Max just _happened_ to learn a few new vocabulary words at a place called _school_, and _maybe_ she just so happened to like this one. Did you ever think of that, dear Fang?" I asked dangerously.

Fang just grinned even wider, and started shaking with suppressed laughter. Oh, he was _so_ going to get it.

Fifteen minutes later Fang was tied to a tree and I was stalking towards his room, intending to ransack it as part of my revenge. There was nothing Fang hated more than having his room a mess.

**So there you have it. For the next one I tag… Tassel630! Again! Because I'm already kinda in trouble with Ninja C since I owe her a Gazzy fic, and she won't stop bugging me to hurry up and write the last chapter of a horrible story I started a year ago for Fullmetal Alchemist and never finished because I thought it was so awful. **

**Tassel630, tag, you're it! -runs and hides behind computer, grateful for once that she has a few states to help protect her-**


	4. Daffodils

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: So, according to Akira, we should probably post our names at the beginning of chapters. If anyone is unclear: Ch. 1, Ninja C, Ch. 2, Tassel630, Ch. 3, Akira, and this would be chapter 4, with myself, Tassel630, once again.**

**I have a new best friend. Her name is jocelyn. She (I assume she's a she by the name, but I suppose you can never be sure) became the first person to review this that didn't help to author it. Yay!**

**We were having issues with the DocX feature - long story - so that's why there was no chapter a couple days ago, dear nonexistent readers. We apologize. XD**

**And by the way, Akira, I wasn't unhappy that it was my turn. I was unhappy - scratch that, murderously enraged - that Ninja C sprung the one day deadline on me AFTER she tagged me. Okay, not really. I was humorously annoyed.**

**Disclaimer: Hrm. I'm pretty sure that the three of us and our other friends will be the first people ever to write fanfiction for our own stories. Assuming we get published sometime in the far-off future. Hence, none of us are James Patterson.**

D is for: Daffodils

"Look, Max! It's so pretty!"

I glanced down. Below us, the forest was beginning to thin slightly. Angel was pointing toward a small field-slash-clearing-thing. Obviously, the wildflowers growing there had caught her attention.

"Angel, we're almost there. If we just - "

"Please, Max? Can we go look at it, just for a minute? We've been flying for a while."

"And I really could use a stretch and, ah, a tree, if you get my drift," Total added helpfully from my arms.

I was really more concerned about Fang, Iggy, and Nudge, who were having difficulties with Akila, although I certainly did _not_ want Total relieving himself on my shirt. They could not seem to come up with an easy way to carry her, and though her weight between the three of them was comparative to one person carrying Total, we _had_ been flying for a while. They would never complain, of course, but Nudge was beginning to wilt. The Gasman flitted around them nervously, unsure how to help.

"Well, I guess," I said, with that special leader-ly decisiveness of mine. We descended, flaring our wings and landing gracefully. At least, Angel, Gazzy and I were graceful. It's a _bit_ tougher carrying Akila. She did not seem too concerned, however, and immediately started sniffing around with Total. Angel and Nudge ran around picking bouquets of daffodils, and Fang and I sat around the edge of the clearing, leaning against a tree trunk.

Akila had lost interest in the sniffing and was lying in the shade. Total vainly tried to recapture her attention. When she merely started panting, he trotted, slightly put-off, over to Fang and I.

"Akila isn't paying attention to me at all," he complained, sounding almost desolate.

"She's probably just tired, Total," I said reasonably, although why a dog would be tired after such a long day of being _carried_ everywhere, I had no idea.

"You should give her flowers, Total," Fang suggested. "Girls like flowers."

Total perked up at the idea of something to do and ran over to Angel. I rounded on Fang.

"'Girls like flowers?' Excuse me? When did you come to that conclusion?"

"Well, Nudge and Angel are certainly enjoying them."

This was true, but it was just an excuse. "Hmph," I said, leaning back against the tree.

Total was now approaching Akila again, carefully holding six or seven daffodils in his mouth. She perked up her ears at him, and he proffered them to her, his short tail wagging. Hers thumped the ground.

He set them down on her paw and said, "Now I'm sure you knew this, but daffodils are meant to represent chivalry..." He was trying to impress her with his intelligence, apparently.

She sniffed the flowers delicately, and Total paused and watched her nervously. She sniffed it for a moment more - apparently it was an extremely interesting daffodil, I wouldn't know - before opening her mouth, biting of the nearest daffodil head, and swallowing it.

The Gasman called across the clearing. "I think that means she likes them, Total!"

**A/N: That didn't really turn out how I was expecting, but oh well. I tag... Drumroll please... Are you ready? Ok. Ok. You sure you're ready? You're ready for me to tell you who is doing the next chapter? Are you sure? Positive? Absolutely positive?**

**What's that? Shut up and just tell you already? Oh, fine then. As long as you're sure you're ready.**

**I tag... Ninja C!**

**This has been Tassel630 presenting your annoying-author's-note of the day. Over and out.**


	5. Egregious Effervescence

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Instead of doing a project due in four days, writing a killer essay, or studying for my – what is it? – three tests I have tomorrow, I'm going to write fanfiction. Because that's how things operate in my world. Sorry if I sound worn, but that's how I tend to feel around exam time.**

**Disclaimer: Life is like a box of chocolates. I just didn't pick the piece that had Maximum Ride included in it.**

E is for: Egregious Effervescence

Dinner was always a rather… _apprehensive_ time of day for the flock. Dinner entails food, and food needs to be eaten. By organisms. Organisms with digestion issues, for example.

"What's for dinner, Ig?" I asked conversationally as I strolled into the kitchen.

He gave me an uneasy look and held up a can. "This?" he half-asked. "It was the only thing I could find in the cabinet, so I put it in the pot. Then I realized what it smelled like." He held it out for me to see.

"_Chili?!" _I asked in disbelief. "Are you _kidding_ me, Iggy?"

"I'm _blind!_" he defended automatically. "How was I supposed to know?"

"_Ask_ me or Fang?" I suggested sardonically.

"Well, it's too late to take it off _now_!" Iggy pointed at the pan… somehow.

I huffed at him. "Fine. I'll go get everyone for dinner." I then proceeded to calmly stomp away from him.

Once everyone was inside, had stopped throwing Nudge's headband around, and had washed up (yeah, right), they all saw what was for dinner.

Angel looked apprehensive. Nudge was trying to stifle her giggles at the memory of what had happened last time we'd had Mexican, and Iggy just stiffly walked around the table, plopping the chili impeccably into bowls. Fang gave me a look, and I shook my head sadly. And Gazzy looked fairly uncomfortable.

Oh, boy.

We all talked throughout dinner, of course, but it was so tense in that room, I probably couldn't have walked out of it. Iggy began cleaning up, and the danger had passed. We had actually made it through a spicy dinner without the roof being blown off the –

Oh, _ew_.

"Holy - !" I let the tentative swear word stay a mystery. The kids were here. "GASMAN!"

"Ew, ew, ew, ew, _ew_!" Nudge squealed, at the same time that Iggy dropped the pan he was washing into the sink with a deafening CLANG! to rush outside, holding his nose. Angel's eyes were watering, and she was trying not to laugh as she backed slowly away.

"You can't _attempt_ to restrain yourself, little man?" Fang half-laughed, half-choked, and he left, too.

"God, I _hate_ it when you effervesce, Gazzy!" Nudge berated.

"Dictionary again, Nudge?" I asked while Gazzy sat up straighter in his chair, proud of his… accomplishment.

She nodded, and Gazzy farted again.

We ducked out of the room, but not quick enough to help hearing, "Did you guys feed the fish today? He looks like he might have died! Oh, wait… that was me. Sweet!"

Boys.

**God, we pick on Gazzy too much, guys. Poor thing. Title came from my dictionary-exploring experience, and it's late because I had three tests to study for. And I still have to do my essay and project. Fork. Hey, that ties into my other – never mind.**

**And since I thought of a topic first and Tassel630 and Akira43 refused to take part in it, I tag… myself! Go me!**


	6. Fork

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Me again! Oh, hey, I just realized that I never said who it was that wrote last chapter. So, yeah, this is Ninja C, and I was Ninja C last chapter too. 'Kay? Great. Also, this is kind of a continuation of Chapter 2/Batchelder.**

**WARNING. This chapter would merit the rating being bumped up to, like, somewhere between T and M, it's just that, since that rating doesn't exist, it's only going up to T. Language. Though, actually, this was a true story from Unigu Mika, transformed into Max Ride.**

**Disclaimer: I most certainly do not own Max Ride, any fork-manufacturing company, or Unigu Mika's nephew.**

F is for: Fork

Max sat on the lawn with Gazzy.

"_Fork_, Gazzy."

"Furt!"

"No, no, _fork_."

"Feek!"

Max sighed. She had been assigned the task of teaching Gazzy some new words.

"Everyone inside! It's time for lunch!"

The flock responded instantaneously to Jeb's summons, eager for food. Max gathered up Angel, and they all headed inside. Gazzy and Iggy were already seated at the table.

Jeb began laying out the silverware. First spoons, then knives, and, lastly, forks.

The Gasman took one look at his fork, pointed at it, and yelled, "FUUUUUUUUCK!"

Max's eyes went wide. _That_ had certainly not been an example Gazzy had supplied during his "Maxucation", as Iggy and Fang called it. Iggy spit out his water and began roaring with laughter. Angel giggled, too, but she didn't know what was going on. Nudge looked around confusedly. And Fang was _rolling_. Max looked up tentatively into Jeb's shocked face.

"…I tried, okay?" she defended weakly.

Jeb smiled a little. "It's okay, Max. Let's just hope he didn't learn that from _you_."

**Oh, the bizarreness. Sorry about that, guys. It was just too good of a story to not manipulate into fanfiction. *prays that no one stops reading***

**Next chapter: me again! Great choice, self.**


	7. Gullible Gazzy

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Yep, still Ninja C here. If anyone's still reading this after last chapter… I'M SORRY, OKAY?!**

**More Gazzy. Again, I'M SORRY! I mean, come on, it's **_**G**_**.**

**Disclaimer: I wonder what would happen to a person who said they **_**did**_** own Max Ride. Wait, then it wouldn't be a disclaimer. POINT DISPROVEN!**

G is for: Gullible Gazzy

One day Iggy strode up to the Gasman, that look in his eye that I _knew_ meant something bad. I sat back and decided to watch the show.

"Hey, Gaz," Iggy prefaced, and the girls came a bit closer to see what was going on. "There's gullible written on the ceiling."

"Psh," Gazzy pshed. "You think I'd fall for that? Besides, how would you know?" He stalked triumphantly to the TV.

"You sure got him that time, Ig," Fang put in sarcastically, and he and the girls left again.

"Sorry, Ig, but I'm with Fang on that one," I added. "That was pathetic."

"Oh, just wait," Iggy said. I rolled my eyes.

Half an hour later, we were strolling the streets of Chicago, our latest pit stop on the great ride of life.

"Hey, Max," Iggy said as he came up beside me.

"Hey, what?" I responded.

"You remember how I said to just wait? Yeah, waiting's over."

"Can't _wait_ to see what this is about," I said cheekily, putting emphasis on the pun.

"Har-_dee_-har," Fang said helpfully, which made me stick out my tongue at him.

Iggy left to go do his business while Fang and I watched eagerly, at the same time trying to rein in the little-girl-shopping gene that was apparently never put into my system. _I_ certainly never acted this way when I was Nudge's age.

"Gaz," Iggy tapped him on the shoulder. "I heard somewhere that if you say 'elephant' really, _really_ slowly, it sounds like 'gullible'."

"Please," I muttered quietly to Fang. "Gazzy would never - "

"_Really_?" Gazzy looked shocked. "Hang on, hang on – _elllllllllllleeeeeephaaaaaaaaannnnnnnttttt. _Wait – lemme try it again - "

But we were all already laughing in his face. Realization came onto his face.

"You _suck_, Iggy," he said, stomping ahead a few paces, and we all took the rest of the walk recounting how gullible Gazzy is.

**Oh my god. This time the story was actually from Tassel630 and her uncle Chuck. Oh, Tassel, I love your uncle.**

**Next chapter shall be: Akira43. It's about time someone else wrote something.**


	8. He Hugged Her

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Disclaimer:**** You already know none of us own it. So why do we keep putting these things here? For legal reasons? Psh. As if JP would sue us for forgetting a disclaimer.**

H is for: He Hugged Her

One day Fang walked into the kitchen to find Nudge sitting by herself at the table, looking dejected. He walked over to her and sat down, waiting to see if she wanted to talk about what was bothering her.

"Fang?" Nudge asked after a moment, "What's it like being a big brother?"

Fang was caught off-guard with this question, but didn't show it. "You know I'm not really a big brother, Nudge."

"I know," she replied, "but you're like a brother to me, and you're older, so I thought I might ask you."

"Why not ask Gazzy?" Fang questioned her, trying to avoid answering.

"Because you happened to walk into the room first. So what's it like? How does it feel? Is it hard to be a big brother? Does it ever get annoying?"

Fang thought for a moment, then said, "It's not really something that I can explain. I'm just Fang, and you guys are just my family. Sometimes, since I'm older than you guys, I have to help you and teach you how to do things, and that can be fun. Other times, though, you guys teach _me_ new things that I didn't know. Why? What are you thinking about?"

"Well," Nudge said, stretching out the word, and then began to talk really fast. "I was thinking about if I was with my real family, you know, if we never went to the School? And I was wondering if I would have any brothers or sisters. I mean, would I be a big sister? Would I have a little brother, or a little sister, or one of each? What if I was the youngest? Would my big brother or sister like me? Would they be nice to me or would they always get annoyed and yell at me to go away? What kinds of things would they like? Would they—"

"Nudge," Fang said gently, stopping her in mid-sentence. "Your brothers and sisters would love you. You'd be a great big sister, or a little sister—you already are."

"Thanks, Fang," Nudge said, smiling at him. "You know, if I had a big brother, I'd want him to be just like you."

Fang was touched by this statement. "Thank you, Nudge," he said, and with that, he hugged her.

**A/N:**** Yay for Fang and Nudge! I really liked the interaction between them at the beginning of the first book, so I thought it would be fun to write a brother/sister moment between the two of them. Hope you enjoyed it, and it'd be great if you could send a quick review with a thumbs-up or thumbs-down to us—so far the majority of the feedback we've received is from each other (how ironic).**

**Stay tuned for another short fic by Tassel630!**


	9. Iggy Immobilizes Inertia

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! HELP! NINJA C AND AKIRA ARE GOING TO **_**KILL**_** ME! **

**I'm sorry, guys. Truly, sincerely sorry. It's totally my fault that we're behind on chapters. Except that I blame my math teacher, because that woman is the root of all my problems. XD Plus, you know, EXAMS. XP**

**Disclaimer: Have you ever seen a book accidentally come out two days after the date? What does that tell you about me?**

I is for: Iggy Immobilizes Inertia

"Guys," Iggy said quietly, walking up from behind us. "Guys."

We all turned to look at him, Fang and I doing automatic 360-degree sweeps, suprised by the odd edge in his voice. Nope, no erasers/flyboys/whatever new monsters they were planning on sending after us.

"What's up?" I asked.

His brow was furrowed over his sightless eyes, like he was concerned or confused. "I think..." he said hesitantly. "I think I might have developed another new power."

I stared at him. _Another?_

"What is it?" Angel asked, an odd little half-smile on her face. "Show us!"

"Not in the middle of a busy street," I hissed. I glanced around. A deserted children's park was nearby. "Over here."

They all followed me without question, Iggy the slowest of all, following the sounds of our footsteps. He bent over and snatched a small, palm-sized stone off the ground as he came. How he knew it was there, I had no idea. He tossed it between his hands nervously.

"This should be a good spot," I muttered, halting behind the playground, out of public view. "What is it, Iggy?"

"I..." he said. He took a deep breath. "I could, if I wanted, throw this rock," he demonstrated, miming a toss, "and then make it slow down, change direction, and zoom back into my hand."

There was a silence.

"So... you mean, like, moving thins with your mind?" I asked. "Like telekinesis?"

"I'll just show you," he said. He took another deep breath, and then, with a completely straight face, threw the rock directly up and caught it again, despite is blindness.

"Why, you little - " I said, swiping at him, but not quite able to keep a grin off my face.

Cackling at his joke and attempting to make his escape before we pummeled him, Iggy threw his wings open and flung himself into the sky.

**A/N: ...Please don't kill me. Akira, you're up.**


	10. Jungle Jumped

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N:**** Hey ya'll, Akira here again, and I'll be here for the next one as well. But first, I wanted to make a little note about something jocelyn mentioned in a review on C is for: Collaborative Chocolate Cake.**

**I don't have time to look up the exact wording, but she mentioned that Fang and Max didn't know about the clones while they were at Anne's house. My response: Exactly. When they talk about "Are you a clone?" they're just joking around--they don't **_**really**_** think that the other one is a clone. I put it in there as irony since **_**we**_** know, as the reader, that in the future there **_**is**_** actually a clone. Does that make any sense? I hope that helps to clear up any confusion. Thank you to jocelyn for bringing that up; I'm glad you did.**

**Anyways, without further ado, on to the story.**

**Disclaimer: This is here just to irritate the reader by preventing them from getting to the actually story.**

J is for: Jungle Jumped

"Max… help…"the Gasman panted, stumbling into our makeshift camp.

"What wrong?" I asked, worried. The rest of the flock was off playing in the woods while I repacked our bags—did something bad happen? Was everyone okay?

"It's like…a…jungle…out there. Lion…coming. Quick…hide me!" he panted, dragging himself towards me.

I let out the breath I had been holding—it was just the game they were playing.

Wait, lion?

"_Roar!!!"_

"Aaaaaaah!"

Out of nowhere a black blob darted out of the forest, tackling the Gasman. I jumped up to help him, then stopped. He was _laughing_.

"What the—"I began, confused, then chuckled as I realized who the black blob was. It was Fang, and he was now perched on top of the squirming 8-year-old, tickling him relentlessly.

"_Roar!_" he growled again, "I've got you now! You can't escape the King of the Jungle!"

I grinned—so that's what the Gasman meant when he said there was a lion coming.

"King of the jungle?" I asked teasingly. "Oh my, I'm _soooo_ scared!"

Fang looked at me and grinned. "You should be."

He leapt off of the Gasman and tackled me to the ground, catching me off guard, and began to give me the same treatment.

"Fang, stop!" I managed to squeak out through my laughter.

"Not until you admit that I'm the scariest lion in the jungle," he insisted, grin widening.

"No way!" I managed to squeak out again, then started laughing even harder as he increased the intensity of his tickling.

"Fang!" I tried to shout at him, but it came out more like a laugh than a shout, and he _still_ refused to stop.

"Okay, fine! Just stop for a second!" I eventually got out, and sure enough, he let up.

"Say it," he demanded, wiggling his fingers threateningly.

"Wait, let me catch my breath," I begged him, and he heaved an exaggerated sigh.

"Now. Say it," he repeated when I could breathe again.

"No," I said, sticking my chin out.

"Okay, fine!" I interjected when he began to tickle me lightly again. He sat back patiently, his eyes showing his amusement.

I took a deep breath, then mumbled, "You're a very scary lion."

"What's that?" he asked, cupping a hand to his ear. "I can't quite hear you."

I scowled, knowing darn well that he heard every word.

"I said you're a very scary lion," I repeated, only a little louder.

"Did you say something? I still didn't—"

"I SAID YOU'RE A VERY SCARY LION!" I shouted in frustration, then slapped my hand over my mouth when I realized what I had done.

"Thanks. I get that a lot," he smirked at me.

"Gee, wonder why," I muttered under my breath.

He grinned one more time, then got up and walked back into the woods, already searching for his next victim.

**A/N: So maybe this would have worked better as K is for: King, but I have another idea for K that I think you'll like. I tag myself, so stay tuned – the next one will be up as soon as I can finish it.**


	11. Kids Kick Kris Kringle

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Sorry for the delay in getting this one done—I had a lot of stuff to do this weekend. Plus, right before I was going to sit down and typed this, I was nailing the back onto my new bookcase and managed to hit my thumb instead of the nail. It's kinda hard for me to type with only one hand, so I had to wait for it**** to stop hurting before**** I could start this.**

**Anyways, just in case there's someone who doesn't know, Kris Kringle = Santa Claus. Hopefully that will clear up any potential confusion about the title.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the MR characters or Kris Kringle/Santa Claus… I think.**

K is for: Kids Kick Kris Kringle (try saying _that_ five times fast)

"Man, I so wish I could see this," Iggy said, grinning.

"Just picture Fang with a white beard and a jolly grin while wearing a bright red Santa suit," I told him.

Fang grimaced. "I don't see why _I_ have to dress up. Why can't Iggy do it? Why does one of us even have to do it at all?"

"Because, Fang," I explained for the thousandth time, "Iggy can't dress up because he has to be able to hear when everyone else starts waking up. And since Jeb used to dress up every year, we should continue the tradition. Besides, it's only for a couple hours."

Fang just grumbled something incoherently in response.

"I think I hear Gazzy coming. It sound like Angel and Nudge are on their way, too," Iggy said softly.

"Cheer up; Santa isn't supposed to be grumpy," I chastised Fang, and he scowled at me.

Just then, Gazzy stumbled into the room, rubbing his eyes sleepily. He gave me a little wave, the stopped and did a double take.

"Max! Move!" he shouted, then charged at Fang, kicking him where it _really_ hurts.

I grabbed the back of his shirt as he prepared to launch himself at Fang again. "Geez, Gazzy, calm down," I pleaded with him.

"Let _go_ of me Max! Are you blind?! Can't you see that there was someone _right next to_ you that broke into our house?!"

I stared at him for a moment, then laughed, not able to help myself. "He's not an intruder, Gazzy," I assured him.

"Yeah Gaz, it's only Fang," Angel chimed in, dragging a half-asleep Nudge behind her.

Gazzy looked back and forth between me, Angel, and Fang, who was standing up now and looking _very_ angry. "Oh," he stated ever-so-eloquently. "Um, Merry Christmas?" he asked Fang.

Everyone except Fang and the Gasman laughed. "I'm _never_ doing this again, Max. Not in a thousand years," Fang stated matter-of-factly.

"Whatever, Fang," I told him, but in my mind I was already planning on how to convince him for next year.

**A/N: So there you have it--A kid kicked Kris Kringle. Hope you liked it, and feel free to drop us a review—we get ridiculously excited when someone other than ourselves reviews (or at least I do).**

**Next up: Tassel630 with the letter L.**


	12. Llamas Lack Lollipops

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: So, apparently we're trying to catch up to our one-chapter-a-day idea. Why did we ever think we could do that again? -shrugs- Ah, well. By the way, this is Tassel speaking, and last chapter was Akira, since she never mentioned. -accusatory glare- **

**Disclaimer: I wish I had a llama. Almost as much as I wish I owned Maximum Ride.**

L is for: Llamas Lack Lollipops

"We're going to the petting zoo, we're going to the petting zoo!" Angel sang in excitement.

"Why did we decide to do this again?" Fang muttered.

"Because it's Angel's seventh birthday, and she gets to take us wherever she wants," I said matter-of-factly.

We were _walking_, for once - yeah, I know, weird, right? - because the pre-visit scout-out of the petting zoo provided no easy place for us to land without being seen. Unfortunately, that meant that we also wouldn't be able to take off in an emergency without being seen, but I was okay with it. I mean, I wasn't being paranoid or anything. I definitely _wasn't_ freaking out. Or getting dizzy from the constant 360s. I was _perfectly_ in control of myself - SO NOT FREAKING OUT.

Okay, so I was slightly nervous. SLIGHTLY.

Anyway, we had landed about a half-mile away, and the younger three had chosen to walk rather than trust Fang or I, or especially Iggy, behind the wheel of another stolen - ah, _borrowed_ - car.

"Max, what kinda animals do you think they have there? Do you think they have horses? I hope so. Max, if they have horses, can I have one? Or just a pony? Do you think they have cows? I like cows, too. They have pretty eyes. Or what about cats? I - "

"I don't know what kind of animals they have, Nudge," I interrupted. "And no, you can't have another pet. Especially not something as heavy as a horse. Besides, we already have Total and Akila."

"Are you implying that Akila and I are pets?" Total interjected, indignant.

"No, no, of course not," I assured him.

"A puppy!" Angel squealed, bending over to pet the squirming little brown thing. Akila licked it across its face. Total held his head up and walked away in a dignified manner as the puppy attempted to... ah... greet him in a traditional canine manner.

"Here, puppy," Nudge said, reaching into her pocket and holding something out to the puppy.

"Nudge, you can't give puppies chocolate," Iggy said. "It's poisonous to them.

"Oh," she said, and magically produced a starburst from her pocket and fed it to the puppy. "I'll give the chocolate to the cows."

And _I_ don't get candy _why_, exactly? I mean, come on. I'm lovable. Occasionally. I can be cute. If I want to be. I'm part _bird_, for crying out loud. Do the wings count for anything?!

No, of course not. Nudge also somehow produced fruit rollups for the ponies, tootsie rolls for the goats, and gushers for the chickens.

Where did she get all this candy?!

"I only have lollipops left!" she sang. "What other animals are there?"

"Llamas!" Gazzy told her happily.

"What's a llama?" she asked. Okay, so our educations were not exactly ideal.

"It's sort of like a camel," Iggy tried to explain. "Only no humps, and furrier, and white. Well, not necessarily white, they can also be gray and brown..." How the blind kid knows about llama coat colors, I don't know.

We neared the llama pen. Two white llamas stood by the fence, looking at us with a mixture of boredom and expectancy. Nudge, a bit nervous about the big, foreign creatures, unwrapped a lollipop.

It spit, launching a huge, greenish glob of saliva through the air.

It hit Fang in the side of the face.

"EW!" Nudge shrieked. "Gross!"

Fang attempted to wipe the slime off his face with some dignity.

As we left the petting zoo, sucking on lollipops, I told Nudge, "I'm glad you didn't feed these to the llamas." Our food-deprived systems were going to be on major sugar-rush later.

"Yeah, me too," Fang said. "You shouldn't reward a naughty llama."

**A/N: Eenie, meenie, meinie, moe! Ninja C is up!**


	13. Monthly

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Is anyone still here? HELLOOOOOO? –echo- …OH MY GOD, DELAY! Jeez, Akira and Tassel. At least ****_I_**** have some semblance of work ethic… when it comes to fanfiction… Anywho, HAPPY MILK DAY! (Actually named Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Long story: quick glance at the calendar by the ditziest ****_boy_**** on the planet.)**

**Disclaimer: I have a dream… that one day, I, Ninja C, may own Maximum Ride.**

M is for: Monthly

This new hotel was the shiz, I had to say. We were in Wyoming – but that part's not important. I won't tell you why we were there. How's that for suspense, huh?

"Whoa," all but Iggy said as we opened the door to our _suite_ – yes, _suite_, courtesy of Angel. Have I mentioned today how much I love that girl?

I won't bore you with the details, but it was _awesome_. On request of Nudge, we decided to go to the pool.

Well. This was going to be awkward for me. Iggy called bathroom first, but I stopped him before he went in. I surreptitiously dug out from my bag some… ah… _protection_. And no, I'm not going to elaborate further than that.

"Hey, can you drop these in a drawer in there for me?" I asked Iggy.

"Sure, whatever," he replied.

I tossed the box to him. Unfortunately I had never noticed that the top was slightly ajar. Iggy caught it upside down. I don't blame him for what happened; I'm shocked he even caught the box with no warning. Anyway, the tampons spilled out. ALL of them. Iggy, not knowing what they were, yelped. I was so proud. They had been shaped in my image to be excessively paranoid.

Angel and Nudge looked down at the floor, unperturbed. They did start giggling, but I'm pretty sure it was just since they hadn't done it in about four seconds, being little girls and all. Gazzy's mouth fell open, and he started roaring with laughter. Fang blushed slightly pink, which for him was about 198-degree-fever level. Iggy leaned down to pick up all the tampons. I was _so_ glad he couldn't see.

"What _are_ these things, anyway?" he asked me in an annoyed tone, holding one tampon between his thumb and forefinger. "It feels… pink or something."

I tried not to laugh as I said, "Ig, they're my tampons. For that time of the month."

Iggy screeched, dropped the tampon, and ran to the bathroom, from whence his yells and curses at me could be heard over the running of the faucet.

"I HATE YOU, MAXIMUM RIDE!"

Even Fang doubled over laughing.

**I originally had this idea for a oneshot, but when I got M, I just couldn't resist.**

**N goes to… me again! Oh, the fun I will have.**


	14. Nature

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**AAAAAAGH!!! INFLUX OF CHAPTERS!!! Yes, yes, I know, my little darlings, it's frightening me too. Hopefully there'll be just ****_one _****more tonight.**

**Guys, thanks for reviewing through the first half of the fic! It means a lot to our little, review-dependent hearts.**

**Disclaimer: Max Ride? Not mine. ****_My_**** life? Not mine! How does that come about, huh?**

N is for: Nature

"GIVE HER BACK, IGGY!"

"IGGY! GIVE ANGEL THE BEAR!"

"Okay, okay, jeez!"

I scowled at Iggy, the little bastard. Stealing Angel's most prized possession… oh, he was _soooo_ gonna get it.

I prepared to lunge for my disruptive target while Angel snatched Celeste from Iggy's clutches, but felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Go back to sleep," Fang, who was on watch, whispered.

I looked up at the other branches. Yep, another twilight, another timber. Filled with wide-awake bird kids.

"Guys, _seriously_," I implored, "it's our first night off the clock. Let's get some much-needed sleep."

"I'm way too excited to sleep!" Gazzy let out a loud wolf-howl to demonstrate his awakeness. I covered my aching ears. Battling Itex took a lot outta me, and it _should_ have done the same for them. All I wanted was a nice, cozy tree branch – check – my flock – check – and some freakin' _sleep_. Notice the lack of check?

"Let's go exploring!" Nudge swung her dangling legs back and forth. "I've never seen Indiana!"

"Yeah, let's fly," Angel agreed, clutching Celeste protectively. Total snored next to her. At least _one_ of us was getting rest. If only it was ME.

I flopped down slightly painfully back onto my branch and let my eyes rove the skies. Indiana stars sure were nice…

My eyes slid shut, and I heard Fang say, "Hey, guys, settle down. We've had a rough day."

The flock began to quiet, and I found my eyes opening again. They weren't supposed to do that! They should have been obliging me some shut-eye!

_So, you like the Midwest?_

_Oh, great. Can you control my nervous system now, too?_ I inquired of the Voice. I tried to shut my eyes again, but they were practically _glued_ open.

_Hold your horses, Sleepy Gonzalez_, the Voice commented on my efforts. _Look at this gorgeous forest._

I looked, while dimly hearing the hushed voices of the girls. _Yeah, trees, flowers, Bambi skipping through the meadow, SO WHAT?_

_Appreciate this while you can, Max. For soon, it may all disappear._

I waited. The Voice seemed to have done his bit.

…_Can I sleep now?_

The Voice took on a bit of a hurt tone. _Fine, fine. Don't come crying to me when it's all over… _And he was gone.

I looked again. Out, at all the other trees in the wood; down, at the sparse grass and retracted wildflowers, tucked in for the night; and up, at the sky and stars.

I don't know how long I laid there or for what reason, looking at the sky while the flock's chatter increased a bit. They must have thought I was asl –

"GAH!"

And the branch _broke._ Freakin' _snapped._ I fell with it, too shell-shocked to unfurl my wings. I landed, on top of the branch, in a cluster of bushes. Birds flew away loudly at the sound of my crash, and deer and rabbits scattered, breaking more branches of their own.

I could see the flock peering down at me, laughing so hard they couldn't breathe. I pulled myself up, my hair full of sharp little bush-needles, clothes torn, while they giggled and chattered louder than ever.

Ah, _nature_.

**Funny? Stupid? Probably the latter, but review anyway to let us know just how pinheaded we really are.**

**Tassel630 gets O. Why? Because there's an "O" in her name, sillies! **


	15. Otherworldly

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: It's about time we had a Fax chapter, don't you think? I've never written Fax before, but I'm going to give it a whirl. And it's, like, minor Fax. So.**

**Disclaimer: Haven't we yet established that JP owns it?**

O is for: Otherworldly

If I couldn't fly, I think I would kill myself.

I mean, seriously, my existence is comprised of an endlessly repeating pattern: get attacked, fly away, settle down, get attacked, fly away, settle down...

With a life as crazy and unpredictable and just plain suckish as mine, a girl needs something to calm her down, keep her sane, maybe give her a little serenity.

Serenity. That was the word. We had started flying late today, so we weren't tired yet, though the sun was down and the stars were out. The moon was bright and not quite full. And night flying, peaceful night flying on clear nights... it felt like, if I just pumped my wings a little harder, I would be flying among the stars, soaring over the moon. I took a quick head count of my flock.

Angel and the Gasman were flying side by side below and in front of me. Nudge, to my left and slightly behind. She was looking up and the moon, which bathed her face in silver. Iggy was behind Angel and Gasser, carrying Total, who was fast asleep. None of them were talking, not even Nudge. For once, I think they were enjoying the silence.

Fang was the only one flying higher than me. He was an almost entirely black silhouette above me, a shadow against the stars. The moonlight gleamed in his eyes and separated his dark feathers from one another, giving them a faint sheen.

If a human could see him now, I think they'd be terrified. A dark, winged, unknown shadow, floating above the world... ominous. They wouldn't call him an alien, the winged-human form was too familiar to their imagination, and he couldn't be called 'mutant' despite the fact that that was what he was - his flight was too stable and natural to be called manufactured. But they _would_ recognize that he was above. Not just above the ground, but above... humanity. Above earth. It was obvious that he was _beyond_. He was otherworldly.

To me, though, the silent glints of his feathers were a reassurance. It made me feel safe.

I knew that we were created by science. And I knew that we were probably all test-tube babies, man-made. But watching Fang fly, especially Fang... it was then that I might just have been able to believe in magic.

**A/N: Huzzah! ...Fromage. (Points to anyone who can tell me what that means without looking it up. Tu seras mon nouveau meilleur ami, si tu sais.)**

**Because she has threatened me with death-by-pickle-beating if she doesn't get P, I tag Ninja C. Hey, that's funny. Death by ****p****ickle if she doesn't get ****P****. (I'M SORRY, AKIRA! NINJA C MADE ME DO IT!)**


	16. Pointless

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**I love Fondays. Don't ask.**

**Disclaimer: Maybe when my pet pig learns to fly, I'll ****_magically_**** have written Maximum Ride.**

P is for: Pointless

No, no, NO! It couldn't be!

My comrades, my brave allies, had all been destroyed. All but one. And he was my last hope, for my own sake and possibly that of mankind.

"Fang! HOW COULD YOU?!" I shrieked at my former friend, the traitor. "How could you do this to me?" Tears threatened to fall from my eyes, but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. My heart was breaking, my brain whirling.

_How could this have happened? _I asked myself. _Why to me? All those years I spent clawing my way to supremacy… I was THIS CLOSE to winning!_

Fang smirked at me. "Are you ready to fall, Maximum Ride?" he asked, an evil glint in his eye.

It was pointless, hopeless to let this go on any longer. I clenched my teeth, braced myself for my defeat…

"D4."

"YOU SUNK MY BATTLESHIP, DAMMIT!"

**I know, I know, short. But is it just me, or was that my funniest one so far? I was laughing my head off through the whole thing.**

**Hope you're still laughing, Akira, because you're it! If you finish Q tonight, we'll be back on schedule! –is so excited-**

**I'm taking this waaaaay too far.**


	17. Quiet

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Howdy, it's Akira here, back from the dead. So most of you have probably experienced not checking your email all weekend, then getting on one night to find that about 5 new chapter alerts—all for the same story. Well, that's what happened to me, except it was for my own (shared/collab) fic. And on top of that, oh, by the way, you're writing Q and we need it, like, **_**tonight**_**. All when you're half asleep. Right.**

**So that's what took me so long, but never fear! I shall get us caught up! And before Z, too.**

**This is a small peek into Iggy's mind and his thoughts on the library the flock went to in New York. Hope you enjoy it—I know Ninja C is excited (consider it a belated Milk Day gift).**

**Disclaimer: Uh, JP doesn't have as many excuses as I do.**

Q is for: Quiet

**li-brar-y** [lahy-brer-ee]_ (n.)_: a place set apart to contain books, periodicals, and other material for reading, viewing, listening, study, or reference, as a room, set of rooms, or building where books may be read or borrowed.

That's the dictionary definition of a library. Normally, the dictionary does a good job of explaining what something is, but for this word, it could improve.

A library is more than just a place for people to use reference materials—it's also a place where one can escape the hubbub of the outside world and just sit and relax. Public libraries are the best—anyone, and I truly mean _anyone_, can use them. Heck, we're mutants and yet we were still allowed to come into this one to use the computers. What nice folks.

New York City is the most overwhelming place I've been—outside of the School, of course, although that doesn't really count. The sounds and smells and even the feelings of this huge city are all just too much. For the past few days, my mind has been overloaded with sensory information—cars on the streets, starting up, backfiring, blaring their horns, the sirens of emergency vehicles; the sounds of doors being opened as people rush in and out of buildings; footsteps as everyone tries to get to their next destination, some fast and light, others slow and heavy; vendors calling out their wares; the occasional _ding _of a coin being dropped on the ground; conversations that sometimes escalated to arguments, and occasionally violence; all from just one sense. One sense out of four. Did I mention that on top of that, I have to listen for where the rest of the flock is and where other people around me are so that I don't run into them?

This city pretty much matched our lives right now—always moving, never slowing, constantly changing. And yet, in the middle of everything, a safe haven is found by pure chance. What else could it be but the public library? Inside, everything is calm, almost peaceful; the serenity of it not only gave my mind a break from deciphering the influx of information, but also gave me a chance to relax for the first time since Angel had been taken away from us.

Inside, instead of blurring together, each sound was individual and unique. From the scrape of chairs being pushed back, clattering of keyboards, hushed whispers, and swish of turning pages, I could paint myself a picture of my surroundings. I knew Max and Fang were off to my right, looking up Institutes online while Angel laid on the floor at their feet, murmuring to herself. Nudge and Gazzy were off to my left, _attempting_ to play hangman. Beyond that, someone was quickly flipping through the pages of a book, trying to find a specific piece of information; someone else tapped their foot while waiting for the elevator, then stopped for a moment, startled by the sound of a falling book.

I liked it here, in this quiet and peaceful atmosphere. I wished we could stay—but no. A guard was headed our way, probably to tell us to leave because the library would be closing soon. We left before they made it over to us, saving them from having to go to the trouble of doing so.

Oh, how I lament the loss of that which is called quiet.

**A/N: That last line is probably pretty messed up, but it's the best I've got right now. Hope you enjoyed this small peek into Iggy's mind, and sorry for the delay (again).**

**Tassel, R is being forced upon you. Don't worry—be happy!**


	18. Rapt Rachel

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: I am seriously fearing for my life here. I think that Ninja C is about to tear me limb from limb, which is the reason why I'm now making this up as I type instead of going to bed.**

**Disclaimer: I own Maximum Ride. -nose grows about three feet- Aw, dang it. I don't.**

R is for: Rapt Rachel

"GAAAAAH!" My eyes flew open as someone screamed. I shot out of bed and out the door, down the hallway. It sounded like the Gasman.

"What's going on?! What happened?!"

"Is everyone okay?!"

"What is it?!"

The flock were all there, immediately on red alert, despite the fact that it was the middle of the night. The Gasman was clutching his pillow, his eyes huge and his fist stuffed into his mouth.

Anne appeared in the doorway. "What's going on? Is everyone okay?"

"What is it, Gazzy? What happened?" I sat down and pulled him onto my lap.

"Dream," he choked.

I took a deep breath, relieved. "It's okay guys. Just a bad dream," I told the room at large. Anne sighed and left, and the rest of the flock dispersed, grumbling slightly as they returned to bed.

I cradled Gasser for a few minutes as he calmed down again. "What was the dream about?" I asked him.

He whimpered.

"Rachel," he whispered.

Rachel? Who was Rachel? A girl in his class at school? Aw... did he have an eight-year-old crush?

"She was chasing me. She practically _stalks_ me."

Scratch that idea.

He babbled on. "She was running after me, and she was shouting gross stuff about how she wanted to kiss me, and it was really gross, and I was running but she was catching up, and so I tried flying, but then she got in a helicopter and followed me and she tried to lasso me and..." He gulped. "It was terrible."

I hugged him and rested my cheek on top of his blond head. He clung to me as if the ceiling would fall in and Rachel would burst through the window if he let go.

"Shh, shh," I soothed him. "It's okay, Gazzy. It's okay."

"I don't know why she can't leave me alone," he mumbled into my shoulder.

I smiled a little. It was such a typical, trivial, _normal_ eight-year-old problem. We never got to settle down enough to worry about something as insignificant as stalking girls.

"I guess she doesn't sit near you while you're digesting lunch, then, huh?"

He gave a weak smile, but his eyes were already half-lidded. I tucked him back into bed and returned to my own room, grinning a little at Gazzy's nightmares.

**A/N: Okay, the last line SUCKS. But I think someone **_**else**_** might kill me if I don't get off the computer NOW. So.**

**And that was supposed to be kinda funny, but it turned out more sweet... oh well...**

**Akira, you're up!**


	19. Shooting Star

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Hey, Akira here again. I decided to write another family-love type chapter, except this time it's between Angel and Max. Hope you enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: Still haven't bought the rights to Max Ride. I did buy a much-needed new pair of shoes, though.**

S is for: Shooting Star

It was night, and I was on watch when I heard one of the younger kids wake up and pad over towards where I was sitting.

"Max?" Angel asked, coming over to sit in my lap.

"Yes, Angel?"

"Do you remember that game we used to play on clear nights like tonight?"

"Um, which one?" I said, mentally skimming through all of my memories.

"The one where we would pretend to catch the stars," she explained. "You know, when we would fly towards a star off in the distance, and when it looked like we were almost there, we'd reach out and pretend to catch it in our hands."

"Oh yeah," I said, now knowing exactly what she was talking about. "I remember. You guys used to spend _hours_ playing that. I could never get you to come down and go to bed."

"Yep!" Angel giggled. "Then you and Fang would chase us, and Iggy would keep trying to help us get away."

I laughed with her at the memory. "We always did catch you, though, in the end. At least, after Fang practically knocked Iggy out and got him to stop helping you guys."

"Yeah," Angel smiled ruefully. "It was still fun, though."

We looked up at the sky, seeing the thousands of pinpoints of light that made up the stars. It was one of those rare moments when we could just sit back and relax, so we were both going to take advantage of it.

"Look Max, quick!" Angel said suddenly. "A shooting star!" She reached out with her hands and closed them just as the star passed through. "I caught it!" she said excitedly.

"Good job, Ange," I congratulated her.

"Here," she said, twisting in my lap to face me. "It's for you."

"Thanks, Angel," I said as I carefully moved the "star" from her hands into mine. "It's very pretty."

"I want you to have it so that no matter how alone and in the dark you feel, you'll always have a little light to help show you the way."

"Oh," I said, mildly surprised, then held her close in a hug. "Thank you, Angel. I love it."

_Thank you, Angel. Really. You have no idea how much this means to me._

She smiled. "I know, Max. I know."

**A/N: Aw, how sweet! I hope it wasn't too corny.**

**Stay tuned, I'll be writing the next chapter too. The A/N's for it will be more important, so please be sure to read them. Oh, and drop us a quick review if you like the story—they do wonders for our inspiration.**


	20. Tess

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: This is really short, and written from Tess's point of view. For those of you who don't remember, Tess is the one girl in Iggy's class that was nice to him and helped him find his way back to their class when he was separated in the White House. It's somewhere in the middle of Book 2 if you need to go back and find it.**

**Disclaimer: Can I reuse one of my old ones? No? That's too bad—I would have.**

T is for: Tess

Life is like a spinning globe. It goes around and around and then suddenly, WHAM, it hits you and your whole world freezes. You think, That's it, That's the one. That's the one that will understand you, and be your friend forever.

The day you walked into our classroom, I barely noticed that another person was with you. I saw you, and _knew_ that you were that person. Not just because you were tall like me, but because you also seemed lost. Even now, I know you have your family, and that they understand you and love you unconditionally, but deep down, you're still looking for that someone, that one person who will undeniably care about and understand you, the one you want to be with for the rest of your life.

Oh, how I miss you. My one true love, my only.

**A/N: First, **_**this is NOT how I really think Tess sees Iggy.**_

**Second, yes, I agree that this is really weird. It started off with Tess talking about how she thought that Iggy looked like someone she wanted to be friends with, and somehow turned into what it is now. I looked back at that last line and was really surprised. But I didn't want to change it--it just didn't feel right. I have no idea where it came from, but don't go looking in my mind for it--you'll get lost.**

**Next up, Tassel will be writing U. **_**Hopefully**_** it will be up on time...**


	21. Underdog

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Hi. Sorry for being late. Again. BUT! We should hopefully be caught up by the end of the night.**

**Takes place at some random fight somewhere… It doesn't really matter.**

**Disclaimer: …I give up.**

U is for: Underdog

Iggy felt a fist connect to his face. He head snapped sideways; his nose started gushing blood. He threw a retaliatory punch, but missed.

"Can't hurt me, blind freak," the Eraser grunted, buffeting Iggy with the gusts from his enormous wings.

"'Cuz you're definitely not a freak yourself," Iggy snapped, and aimed a round house kick at the Eraser's chest, based on the direction of his voice and wing-flaps. He misjudged the distance, but still heard a satisfying _crunch_ as his foot connected with the Eraser's hairy, muscled upper arm.

The Eraser howled. "You blind - !" he screamed, his voice cracking in rage. Spittle splattered across Iggy's face.

A blow to his stomach knocked the wind out of him, and he dropped several feet as he automatically curled himself in for protection. The Eraser fell with more precision, his foot connecting with the top of Iggy's head. Pain erupted in his skull; stars bloomed before his eyes. He swung another kick desperately and felt several hollow bones snapping, feathers crumpling. The eraser screeched in pain, a screech that faded as he fell from the sky…

Iggy hovered for a moment, panting, his nose still dripping blood, sightlessly glaring at his disappearing enemy. "I am no longer the underdog," he muttered furiously, before winging back upward to rejoin the fight.

**A/N: Hey, I didn't think that turned out too bad. I strayed a little from the original underdog idea, so that part was a bit weird, but overall it didn't suck. I think.**

**Reviews are cookies. If you leave me (us) a cookie, you deserve to go make yourself cookies. And then everyone is happy. Yay!**

**I am so special that I get to tag myself. Huzzah.**


	22. Vertical

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: -sigh- I am such a procrastinator. And I'm so bad with deadlines. I blame my math teacher, the source of all problems.**

**P.S. Thanks SO MUCH to everyone who sent in suggestions. I didn't get to use any of them, but they were very inspiring. :)**

**Disclaimer: James Patterson doesn't have a math teacher to blame, now, does he?**

V is for: Vertical

"Time to get uuuuuuuuuup!" I sang as I jogged down the hallway. "It's almost 11:30 in the morning! Wake UP!" I must say, I was succeeding remarkably well at this cheerfulness thing, considering that I had only dragged myself out of bed approximately twenty-four seconds earlier.

I banged into Gazzy's room first. "Get up, sleepy head!" I said cheerfully. His stomach growled. "Come on, you need to feed that monster you're keeping in there." He started stretching, so I figured he was getting up, and I went to Nudge and Angel's room.

"Come on, Nudge, sweetie," I said loudly. "Time for breakfast!" She blinked sleepily. "Time to get up," I told her, not feeling as much of a need to shout as I would later, with Iggy. I strode over to Angel's corner and pulled back the blanket. She was already awake, arranging her stuffed animals in a more acceptable order. "Morning, Angel," I smiled at her. "Breakfast in ten."

She smiled back and continued lining up her stuffed animals. As I turned to leave, I saw that Nudge had rolled back over and had started snoring softly. I shook her awake again and barged into Fang's room next.

Where he was halfway through putting on a clean shirt.

He froze in surprise for a second. I turned bright red. "Uh... yeah, guess you're up," I stuttered, and backed out quickly, snapping the door shut behind me.

I broke down Iggy's door last. "Let's get vertical!" I shouted, yanking his covers off of the bed. He groaned, rolled over, and stuffed his face into his pillow. Normally I would've turned on the lights. Unfortunately, it was tactics like this that had very little success when dealing with Iggy. "UP!"

"Yeah, I can hear you, thanks," came his muffled, irritable reply.

"Come on, I told the kids you'd have breakfast ready in ten minutes. Don't make a liar out of me. Get up!"

Good, so everyone was awake. I peeked into Gazzy's room again to check on him.

He was back huddled under the covers, fast asleep.

I sighed. Time for round two.

**A/N: Yup, a normal morning waking up the flock.**


	23. White Winter

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: And, sadly, I do believe that this is the last chapter you'll see from me, dear readers. (Oh yeah, I just realized, I forgot to say who I was. U, V, and W have all been Tassel, if you didn't realize.) I love you all!**

**I just had to do a snow one, because we got TONS of snow today, where I live.**

**Disclaimer: Believe it or not, I actually KNOW that Max is FEMALE, unlike the summary of MR book 5. -mutters angrily-**

W is for: White Winter

I stared out the window happily. "Angel, it's snowing!" I told the blanket in the corner, which hid Angel's bed. "HEY MAX! IT'S SNOWING!"

"Cool!" I heard her shout back from downstairs, though she sounded a little distracted and I bet that she was just saying that as a reflex reaction. I jumped down the stairs and bounced into the kitchen.

"Who wants to play in the snow with me? Do you think we can have a snowball fight? OOH, do you think we can build a snowman? That would be cool! I've never built a snowman before! Well, there was that one that the Gasman and I tried to build last year, but Iggy blew it up before it was finished, so that doesn't count. We could - "

"I don't know what we'll do, Nudge, but we'll probably all come play in the snow with you," Max interrupted me. "Here, have some breakfast." She took a plate of scrambled eggs from Iggy and set them down in front of me. I wolfed them down, scalding my tongue.

"Outh, Iggy, theth aw hah," I said through a mouthful of hot eggs.

"Yes, that's what happens when they come off of a several-hundred-degree stove," he informed me, but he was grinning. I stuck out my burnt tongue at him, then remembered that he couldn't see it.

"I'm thiking out mah tongue at thou," I told him.

"Lovely."

"I'm ready to go outside!" the Gasman said happily from next to me.

Max got us all bundled up, even Fang, who she insisted should "set a good example for the kids." He, of course, used the same reasoning and ended up forcing her into a puffy blue coat that made her look like a marshmallow. She glared at him over the top of it, which was zipped up to her nose, but I could tell by the way her eyes were crinkling that she was smiling.

"BANZAI!" I heard Gazzy yell from above us. I looked up just in time to see him folding in his wings and dropping, hard, onto a snow-laden tree branch, dumping all of the snow onto Angel and Fang.

Angel disappeared for a second under the snowdrift before her laughing blonde head poked back out of the snow. Fang, covered in white, shouted, "I'll get you for that one, Gasser!" and smiled on of his rare, huge smiles.

I quickly bent over and scooped up some snow, quickly forming a loose snowball. I lobbed it at Fang, hitting him right in the middle of the back just as he was spreading his dark wings through the slits in his coat.

He spun around and spotted me. "Double-teaming!" he shouted, still grinning.

"Nuh-uh!" Gazzy shouted back. "EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF!" He proved his point by flinging a snowball at me.

Despite this proclamation, Iggy and Angel somehow teamed up together. They beat us, the youngest and the blindest (if you can be the blind_est_), even when the four of us remaining grouped together against them.

"I surrender!" Max yelled, the last of our team standing.

"Yes!" Angel yelled, and smacked Iggy a high-five.

"Wanna make a snowman now?" the Gasman suggested.

I glanced at Iggy, who had a suddenly mischievous look on his face.

"Sure," I agreed, "if not only for the pleasure of blowing it up."

**A/N: Yay! Thanks for everything guys! Review, please!**

**Oh yeah, and I tag... um... Ninja C, I believe.**


	24. X

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Yay! I've finally reappeared! And with an owning for Tassel630…**

**Remember when she said she'd "get me back with X or something"? Well, ever since we began formulating this fic, I'd been expecting that I'd do something stupid that would land me with X (which did happen), so I've had it prepared for a while.**

**IN YOUR FACE.**

**Disclaimer: Once upon a time, there was a girl who didn't own Max Ride. Her name was Ninja C. She was sad that she didn't own Max Ride. The end.**

**X is for: X**

Finally, the perfect robot.

They had gone through twenty-three different failures. Countless times they had been disappointed. But this model was seen as perfection.

They could morph – fully _morph_ – unlike any of their predecessors. The matrices and wires inside them had been modified to slide and twist as the form of the robots shifted.

The skillful mix of emotion and combativeness proved to be just right. They listened to their commander without questioning, but had variations in their battle makeup.

The avians would finally be Itex's. They may have thought that Itex had been destroyed, but were they ever wrong. They had backup plans.

Plans like this one.

Generation X.

And the hybrids would pay.

**Bizarre, huh? I find that this is not my best chapter, but hey, it was written, like, once I finished A. Since I knew something like this would happen and all.**

**But OMG! When I thought up the topic, I just started maniacally laughing! Wasn't it at least an outstanding topic?**

**Tagging myself, and then my run of this fic shall be done. Later, guys.**


	25. Yttrium

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**Wow. My last chapter of this fic. Is it just me, or did this month go by fast? I know that this definitely kept me going through January and kept me in touch with Tassel and Akira, WAY more than usual, even though they're my best friends and all.**

**But I digress.**

**Disclaimer: Things I don't own – Maximum Ride. Need I go on?**

Y is for: Yttrium

Itryum Yitriyum Thisisstupidtrium

"Hey, Ig," Fang said while the two of them were holed up in his room after school in Virginia, doing their stupid science homework that would really have no bearing whatsoever in their future lives. "How do you spell Yttrium?"

Iggy scoffed. "How would _I_ know? I'm _blind_," he offered helpfully.

"Fine." Fang got off the bed.

"Where you going?"

"Well, I've gotta do this homework somehow," was the reply as Fang went in search of Yttrium.

First stop would be: Nudge. She did mental things like finding correct spellings of words all the time, so she'd be their best bet.

"Hey, Nudge," Fang said as he strolled into the kitchen. Nudge turned toward him. "You know how to spell things."

"Yeah, doesn't everyone?" Nudge giggled. "I mean, everyone's gotta know how to spell _something_, right, like their name and favorite food and col - "

"Yeah, great," Fang cut her off. "Do you know how to spell Yttrium? Me and Ig are doing our science homework and - "

Nudge cut him off this time. "What the heck is _that_? Is that a color? Or a country? Oooh, oooh, I know! I'll bet it's - "

"NUDGE!" Fang implored. "D'you know how to spell it or not?"

"Nope," Nudge said, and Fang left.

Who next to ask? He didn't want to go to Max, because… well, she was Max; Gazzy and Angel were too young; and he was certainly not going to go to Anne. He disliked her almost as much as Max did.

So, by process of elimination, to Gazzy.

Fang looked all over the house, but Gaz was nowhere to be found.  
He finally decided to go to Anne's room, as much as he didn't want to. If one of the flock was missing, he'd prefer that someone knew where they were.

"Anne?" he asked after knocking and getting no answer. "You in here?"

"Oh, Nick, is that you?" he heard from the closet. He peered in to see her organizing her clothes. Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, he asked, "Have you seen Zephyr? I've been looking all over for him."

"He went out with a friend; didn't you know?" she replied. He shook his head. _Gazzy has a friend?_

"Do you, by any chance, know how to spell Yttrium?" he asked. As long as he was here…

"Um… Y-i-… no… that's a pretty hard one," she admitted.

"Okay. Thanks anyway."

Fang was stumped. The only other possible candidate was Max. He did NOT want to look stupid in front of Max.

"FNICK!" Iggy hollered from up the stairs. "HAVE YOU FIGURED IT OUT YET?"

Damn. To Max, then.

But where was _she_?

After another housewide search, Fang found Max sitting by the lake, wings outstretched. She must have sensed his approach, because before he reached her, she turned and said, "Hey."

He sat down wordlessly next to her. Once he was there and comfortable, he began.

"Know that you are my last resort. I didn't want it to come down to this, but Iggy… Anyway. Do you know how to spell Yttrium?"

Max looked at him, her brow furrowed. Suddenly, she burst out laughing so hard she was rocking back and forth.

"You… don't… know… how to… spell…" she choked out. Then she abruptly stopped. "Neither do I."

"Oh, come _on_!" Fang yelled to the heavens. "Doesn't ANYONE know how to spell Yttrium?!"

Angel strolled past, Total trotting alongside her. "Silly Fang," she giggled. "We've had no proper education. Of course we can't spell it." She left, with Fang wondering at how out-of-character that was.

Total sniffed haughtily from the too-tall grass. "Yttrium. Y-T-T-R-I-U-M. Discovered 1787 in Sweden. Can cause lung disease in humans."

Fang raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, _honestly_," Total huffed as he loped away.

**You don't even want to know how many times I misspelled Yttrium during this writing process.**

**Well, there you have it. My last, fairly suckish chapter that didn't turn out as funnily as I was hoping it would. Ah, well. Can't help it if it accidentally got deleted after I magically forgot to post it with X.**

**And as I'm typing this, it's snowing like **_**mad**_** outside. Like, I can't see out the window. I love Ohio.**

**Akira, you're up. TONIGHT.**


	26. Zipper

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: Hello, dear readers, Akira here. Like Ninja C said, this month has practically flown by while writing this fic, and now we've finally reached the last letter of the alphabet—Z. Thank you for sticking with us all the way through, and I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: If I had a dollar for every time I've written one of these, I'd have enough to buy a copy of the Maximum Ride books, since I ****_don't_**** own the rights and therefore cannot get one for free.**

Z is for: Zipper

Ari was back with the newest version of erasers: Version 6.5, complete with flight capabilities.

Fang knew that he wouldn't be able to fight while holding Total, but he wasn't going to just drop him. Instead, he reached around and felt for the zipper of his backpack. If he put Total in there, he would have his hands free.

Except for one problem: the zipper was stuck.

Fang fiddled with the zipper, trying to pull it free, but to no avail. The flying Erasers were nearly upon them now—time had run out.

"Fang, ditch the dog!" Max cried, more concerned with their safety than with the well-being of their newest family member.

Fang tried to free the zipper one last time, but it still wouldn't open. He would just have to drop Total, let him fall to his death so he could keep the rest of the flock safe.

"Noooo, Fang!" Angel cried, reading his thoughts.

Fang gave the dog one last grim and apologetic look, then released him from his arms.

"AHHHHHHHH!!!!" Total yelled, sitting up and panting as he found himself suddenly in bed.

"What's wrong, Total?" Angel mumbled sleepily next to him.

"Nightmare," he mumbled, then rolled over to his other side, already asleep again.

**A/N: Guess what?**

**This isn't the last chapter.**

**That's right, ladies and gentlemen, there is going to be one more chapter in this collab. At the very beginning, when we first had the idea for this, we decided to add an extra chapter to the end, since 27 is divisible by 3 and 26 is not. Since so far I've written one less chapter than Ninja C and Tassel, I get to do this final wrap-up chapter. So stay tuned for one more day, and thanks for reading.**


	27. Special Extra

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

**A/N: So apparently I'm calendar-challenged. I thought that the 27****th**** day of this fic, and therefore the day this chapter was due to come out, was tomorrow, not today. But it's here, and on time—barely.**

**For this last chapter I tried to choose a theme that would tie up the whole fic. I hope you enjoy it.**

**Disclaimer: If I had the time to write four books, I wouldn't know what to do with it.**

Alphabet Soup

"Animal crackers in my soup," Nudge sang as she broke, well, animal crackers into her soup.

"But what kind of soup is it?" Iggy asked, sitting across the table from her. "This isn't just any old soup, Nudge, it's _my_ soup. Which, as we all know, is the best."

"Campbells' is better," Fang said nonchalantly, giving his two cents on the topic.

"Dun dun _dun_," the Gasman said dramatically, a huge grin plastered on his face.

Everyone now looked at Iggy to see how he would respond. "Well, _Fnick_," Iggy started, "I don't see how you could _possibly_ know that, since you've _never tried it before_."

Fang ate another spoonful of soup before carefully wiping his mouth, dragging out the suspense for as long as possible. "I know," he finally said, "because one, I _have_ had it before, and two, I've read the label."

Gazzy pretended to wince in sympathy. "Ooh, Iggy. That's gotta hurt," he said.

"How could you think that soup from a can tastes better than homemade soup?" Iggy asked, pretending to be offended.

"I think that Campbells' is better," Fang explained, "Because they have alphabet soup. Face it, Ig, tiny pieces of pasta shaped like the letters of the alphabet isn't exactly practical when you're making soup from scratch."

Jumping up from his chair Iggy started towards Fang, probably to beat him, but before he could take more than one step he tripped on Gazzy's chair, which was out farther than usual. He swore once, then got back up and continued to stalk towards Fang again.

"Killing him isn't going to do any good, Ig," I said, trying to avoid a mid-dinner fist-fight.

"Let's all just sit down and get along," Angel chimed in, trying to be helpful.

"My money's on Fang," Gazzy said, more interested in tonight's entertainment than listening to me."

"Nobody is betting on anyone," I said loudly, standing up to try to get everybody's attention. "Iggy, you go back to your seat. Gazzy, stop encouraging them. And Fang, stop being so annoying."

Obeying grudgingly, Iggy returned to his seat. Fang went back to his soup, and Gazzy stood up to get seconds.

"Personally, I think alphabet soup is really neat," I commented, trying to steer us away from the physical violence and towards civil conversation again. "But Iggy's homemade soup is probably the best-tasting."

"Quality is more important," Iggy argued, still trying to win the debate.

Right as Fang opened his mouth to reply, Nudge jumped in again. "But alphabet soup is more fun. I mean, there's so many letters, and you can spell words in your soup, and sometimes they aren't even real words but they sound really cool when you say them."

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious is really fun to make with alphabet soup," Angel piped up again. "It's really hard though—I couldn't find enough of the right letters, so I ended up using two whole cans to do it."

"Two cans for one word? Geez, that must have been hard to do," I told her, going along with her story.

"Uh-huh. But it was mostly because I was really hungry and kept eating the letters while I was trying to spell it."

Violence had yet to break out again, so I figured that we were doing pretty well on the civil conversation thing so far. "Gazzy? What do you think?"

"What do I think?" he repeated. "I think that Iggy's alphabet soup is the best—even though he's never made it before."

"Xylophone is another fun word to spell," Nudge stated, trying to worm her way back into the conversation.

"You still think Campbell's is better?" Iggy asked Fang, wanting his final opinion.

"Zoologists do," Fang replied, "But as for my opinion? The world will never know."

**A/N: I know, I really weird ending, but I needed it for one of the little tricks in this chapter to work out. Should I share the secret? Hmm… I guess I'll just say look at the first letter of each paragraph. I got the idea from something Phoenix Fanatic used in one of her stories (which I forgot to ask if I could borrow… oops. (Disclaimer: I don't own it))**

**Thank you very, very much for reading and reviewing this now-complete collection of Maximum Ride oneshots. Ninja C, Tassel, and I all really appreciate it. We had a lot of fun writing these (except for when Tassel and I were cowering in fear from Ninja C's death threats when we were late) and we hope you had a lot of fun reading them, too. If you liked them, keep an eye out for any new stories posted by us in the future.**


	28. A Notification

**A Collab of Alphabetical Proportions**

A Notification from Ninja C, _Akira43_, and **Tassel630**

You guys thought we were done with this, didn't you? Oh, how wrong you were. We're just getting started. Why do you think I never marked this as "complete"?

_Because you were too lazy? Wouldn't be surprising. Anyways, it's just as well that you didn't, because we're not done. In fact, we're going to do it all over again._

**Yes, people. That is how our lives work. Too busy to do anything? Let's add some fanfiction obligations to the list.**

As I wonder why on earth we think FANFICTION is an obligation, I strongly advise you all to go to Akira's profile, since there you will see Leftover Alphabet Soup. Yes, that is what we're calling it.

...Stop laughing.

**It's largely a continuation of this, but with a couple little differences...**

_Meaning that another twist has been added to (theoretically) make it more fun for us and allow you, the readers, a chance to help pick the topic for each chapter._

**'Cuz that's how much we love you. XD**

So go! Read! Review! Enjoy!

**And hopefully laugh.**

_And, of course, continue to shake your heads sadly at the strange ramblings our minds produce. See you there!_


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